Clean Bill Of Health

Yesterday I took Sarah to see her Cardiologist, Dr. Kort. I love Dr. Kort, he is a very nice, patient man, and he always has a smile on his face. I like him way better than his partner and am so glad that he was the one that was on-call when we took Sarah to the Emergency Room so many years ago (okay, it really was only four, but so many sounds more dramatic and it really does seem like a long time ago). He was the lucky man that got to tell us that Sarah needed emergency heart surgery and was going to be transferred to a different hospital. The way he told us, however, made it seem like it was no big deal and that everything would be okay. It was probably because of him that I underestimated how big her issues really were that week she was in the hospital, but at the time it was better to be naive and not know than be aware of what was really going on. That probably would have killed me.

Anyway, so we went to see Dr. Kort. We usually go to one of his satellite offices, one that is closer to our house but that he only goes to every other Tuesday afternoon. Seriously, it sounds like a joke but that's when he goes. He goes to a different office every afternoon, or almost, so he can see patients from all over the Dallas area, or if you live here they call it the Metroplex, and people don't have to drive as far to see him. For some reason, they told me but I can't remember why because it doesn't have an impact on my daily life and I can barely remember to eat breakfast, he wasn't going to be able to make our original appointment at that office so I ended up rescheduling at his main office in Dallas. It's not that I'm afraid to go to Dallas or anything, it's just a huge pain. There's tons of traffic and it was raining and the appointments always take so long. I like the satellite office because we're the only ones there and they don't have any other patients to see and we get out pretty quickly. When we go to the main office, the appointments take forever. Yesterday we were there for two hours. Sarah did okay but Amanda was starting to lose it and I was so thankful Andy was at camp or it would have been a disaster. My kids love to fight at the doctor's office, any doctor's office, because they leave you in those small, cramped rooms for hours with nothing but torn books and broken toys. Basically it was a very long morning.

Sarah was a little hesitant when Dr. Kort walked in the room because much to my annoyance she has been painfully shy with people lately. Once he let her listen to her heart (and mine and Amanda's) with his stethoscope she warmed up. I have no idea if she actually heard anything, but she says she did so that's all that really matters. I won't bore you with the rest of the details of the appointment, but the end result was she is doing great. Her aorta is growing at the same rate that she is and there are no signs of the coarctation coming back and he reduced our twice-yearly visits to once a year.

Hurray! That is fabulous news. Not that we were worried that there was anything wrong, but it was nice to hear that everything is great. He's happy about her progress and that's all I care about. Unfortunately due to everything with her legs we still have a long road ahead of us, but knowing that her heart is healthy makes the rest a lot easier to deal with. We're getting closer. Hopefully someday, SOMEDAY, we really will be able to look back on this as only a memory.

Kid Quote of the Day

"Really? You prefer me being sweaty?"

-Sarah, after I told her she could not have a third wet wipe in the car. Apparently since I don't give my children baths she was using them to clean not just her hands but her entire body.

Happy Anniversary

Today is my parent's anniversary. 50th anniversary. Can you believe it, 50 years! That is so amazing. Not that I didn't think they would stay married, because I never doubted it, but so few people actually are married for 50 years. It's quite a feat. They met in high school. They went to different schools but worked at the same diner. They dated for seven years, finishing high school and then college and then finally got married. They had a small, but lovely, wedding, and somewhere in that story there is a turkey farm. They had four children together, two boys and two girls, and made it through all the the issues with kids and money and everything else that causes other marriages to fail. Through it all, they stuck together.

In celebration all my brothers and sisters and I and our spouses and kids are going to my parent's house this weekend. 20 people, that's quite a party. We are having a huge family photo session on Saturday morning and then a nice dinner Saturday night. Nothing too crazy, per my mom's wishes, but still a chance to recognize all those years together.

I, of course, did not get them a card, much to my mother's chagrin, because I always forget and it's been extra crazy around here. Instead I am proclaiming my love and appreciation over the internet.

Mom and Dad,

you are an amazing couple, wonderful parents and friends and I am so happy that you have made it this far and after all these years still love each other. You have been fabulous role models and given great advice on how to survive and thrive in a marriage for which I will always be grateful. I love you more than you can imagine.

So, three cheers to Mom and Dad, for making it this far, and hopefully we can celebrate even harder twenty years from now!

Another One Bites The Dust

My friend, Emily, called last week. Even though we don't see each other that much anymore, Emily is one of my best friends in Texas. She was one of the first friends I made after I retired and decided to stay home with Andy. It was a Saturday morning and Charlie was in London on business. Emily's husband was playing golf. We both had the great idea to take our kids to the park. We started chatting and soon found out we had a lot in common. We were both from the mid-west, me from Michigan, her from Iowa, our kids were only a couple months apart, we were about the same age, we both had the same sense of humor and neither one of us had any family in the area. I liked her instantly. We made a date to meet at the park again a few days later. I think we were both a little nervous that the other one wouldn't show up, but we did and became fast friends. Whenever people ask me how I met her, I always laugh and say that I picked her up at the park.

Emily worked three days a week, but we still found time to get together so the kids could play and we could chat. It's hard making friends when you are new to the stay-at-home-mom scene and your kids aren't in school yet. Once they start pre-school or elementary school or other activities like gymnastics or baseball or soccer it's a lot easier, but Andy was only 18 months old so it was tough. Emily was in the same predicament I was, except it was even more difficult for her because she was partly in the working world and partly in the non-working world.

We shared a lot over the last six years. We traded off babysitting, which was awesome. The kids loved to play together and we got some time to ourselves. We shared the joys and pains of trying to get pregnant and the subsequent adjustments to larger families. We moved a little farther away, but we still made an effort to get together. Once the kids were in school it got more challenging, and then when all their activities started it got even harder. We started to see each other less and less. But Emily is one of those friends that no matter how long it's been since you've talked to them, you still have a million things to talk about and can just pick up where you left off. The best way to describe it is comfortable.

So, Emily called last week to tell me that they were moving. To Chicago. Not just a few miles away, try 802 (well, 802 air miles, I'm not sure how many it is on the ground, but you get the picture). I'm excited for her, she'll be back in the mid-west and closer to her family, but bummed for me. I know that I'll see her again, she'll only live about 45 minutes from my brother, but it's not the same. Even though we didn't see each other that often, I always knew she was here and she was family. Soon she'll be gone.

I don't know what it is. I don't expect everyone to stay put forever, everybody moves. In fact, we talk about moving on a regular basis and I seriously doubt that we will stay in Texas forever. I have no idea where we'll go, but I don't think we'll stay here. So why am I so sad? I guess it's the idea that people are moving on, that eventually we will move on. Nothing is permanent. That's not a bad thing, I'm not anti-change, I'm just really happy right now with my friends and our neighbors and the place we live and the schools. I don't want to have to think about making new friends and finding new doctors and whether or not the school system is adequate. I also don't want to have to leave anybody behind.

I'm happy for Emily and I know she is going to love it there. She'll love the changing seasons and the crisp air at Halloween, she'll love the snow and the first signs of spring, she'll get totally involved in all the sports and she will make a ton of friends. I can't wait to visit and see just how well she's doing. I just hope she keeps in touch, because she is one friend that I couldn't stand to lose.

Good-Bye Percy, Hello Harry

As I've mentioned before, Andy, my seven-year-old, loves to read. He has an amazing imagination and truly gets into character. That doesn't just apply to books, it's video games too. When he starts to play a new Wii game or read an exciting book, he gets completely wrapped up in it. For example, when he was four or five he was really into Mario and Luigi from the Mario Bros. They were all he talked about. Well, them and all the other characters from the video game. He was always asking questions like, "Who is your favorite character from Super Mario Galaxy?" and "If you had to be a villain from Mario Bros. who would it be?". I found two hats on eBay that looked exactly like Mario and Luigi's hats (some woman had made them by hand, they were awesome) and we got some overalls and red and green long-sleeved t-shirts. He played Mario and Luigi all the time and even was them for Halloween (we went to so many trick-or-treeting activities that year that he was able to be both of them at different times). He was probably into them for at least a year.

I think the only thing that got him past the Mario Bros. was Star Wars and the Clone Wars. Once again, he went from knowing nothing about them to knowing everything and wanting to play them and be them. You can't even imagine how many Star Wars Lego sets he has, it's crazy. The questions shifted to "Who is your favorite sith?" and "What's your favorite lightsaber color?". He played the Lego Star Wars Wii game so much that by the time we sat down to watch the movies with him he knew everything that was happening. I kept asking him what was going on throughout the movie and he always knew even when it was the first time he had seen it. He could even tell me what was going to happen next. His attention to detail was extraordinary and he truly knew everything there was to know about Star Wars.

His latest thing was Percy Jackson. I liked this topic much better because it was one of my favorite electives in college, Greek Mythology. Plus, it's educational and he was actually learning about things that existed, not something that some genius movie director or video game creator made up. I did get tired of questions such as "Who is your favorite Greek god?" and "If you had to be a minor god which one would it be?", but I did enjoy the books and remembering all the stories I had learned.

Unfortunately, Percy Jackson has been replaced. This time, it's Harry Potter. Luckily Charlie is reading them with him this time, so I don't have to get wrapped up in the books and I get a little more free time in the evening, but that doesn't mean I'm not drawn into the conversation. Unfortunately I've read all seven books and there is a lot of content over seven books so when Andy asks me what happened in chapter eight in book one I have a hard time remembering back that far. So now we'll probably have to buy a wizard costume and a wand and he'll start memorizing all the spells. As long as he doesn't use them on me I'll probably be okay. I can't wait to see what kind of influences Harry has on him and how it changes our dinner time conversations.

Kid Quote of the Day

"You shouldn't hit the driver, Mommy. You should just always hit Andy."

-Sarah, scolding me for hitting Charlie while playing Slug Bug while he was driving.

8:55 a.m.

This is what happens at 8:55 a.m. when you wake up at 5:30 a.m. and refuse to go back to sleep.

Early to Rise

You know the saying. Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. Yeah. Not so much. I guess, though, that I'm not really doing it properly. I'm only doing the early to rise part, and it's not because I really want to, it's because if I don't get up Amanda will scream and scream until she wakes up the entire house. So let's rephrase. Very late to bed, early to rise, makes a man cranky, angry and tired. Yes, that sucks. It doesn't even rhyme.

Amanda has settled into a new waking pattern and it's not one that I like very much. For the past several weeks she has been waking up around 5:30 a.m. If I am lucky she will sleep until 6:00. Unfortunately, since she is still nursing, I am the one who has to get up with her. Don't get me wrong, since Charlie and I take turns sleeping in on the weekends, yesterday after I fed her and brought her back to our room he got up with her. Then I got to go back to sleep. But I didn't even do that until at least 6:30, so he got to sleep that extra time. During the week we sort of take turns, but there's no real pattern to it. Sometimes I get up with her and stay up, sometimes I bring her back to bed and then Charlie gets up with her and takes her into the bathroom while he showers. Regardless of how it works out, it sucks to get up so early in the morning. Period.

Amanda has some weird hatred of her crib right now. She does not want to be in it. She doesn't want to nap, she doesn't want to sleep at night, does not want to be in there. I usually nurse her before she goes to bed or takes a nap. Previously she would fall asleep or be in that drunk drowsy state and I would put her in her bed. She might cry for a second before she wrapped herself in her blanket and went to sleep. Now, she just screams. As soon as I start to stand up from the rocking chair she senses the movement and starts to get agitated, and then when I put her down the shrieking begins. She cries and cries, and usually I come back 10-20 minutes later (not at night, I'm so done with her then she just has to cry it out) and she's standing at the rail so sad and dejected. I feel a little sad for her, but I'm so tired and worn out at this point that I have a hard time mustering much sympathy for her.

I'm hoping this won't last forever, but who knows. Andy used to wake up at 6:00 a.m. when he was a baby. That was partly because we had to get him up to take him to daycare before work, and partly because that's just who he is. When I quit working and he could sleep longer his sleep patterns didn't change. He still to this day wakes around 6:30 every morning regardless of what time he went to bed. It's just innate. It drives us crazy, but during the school year it's fabulous because we never have to wake hhim or use an alarm clock or anything. He just gets up, gets dressed, feeds himself breakfast and then waits for somebody to drive him to school. I would not be surprised if Amanda turns out the same way.

For the next couple of months, at least while she's still nursing, I will have to continue to get up with her. Maybe after that, we can let Andy get up with her and they can have brother and sister bonding time. If only I knew that he would really watch her, and wouldn't let her eat small toys while he played Wii, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Of course, this thought comes from someone who is far too sleep deprived to be wise.

The Tides Are Turning

Well, it's starting to happen. I knew it would, it always does. Yes, that's right, Amanda is starting to like Charlie more than me. Why wouldn't she? He's cuter than me, and lots more fun. He plays and plays and doesn't make her eat green beans, one of the foods that she just doesn't like, or make her take naps. Those are all the things I do.

I started to get suspicious this evening when we were cleaning up after dinner. The older kids were on their way upstairs to get ready for bed and Amanda was still in her high chair. Always in the high chair, poor kid. I asked Charlie to clean her up and take her out. He did, and she didn't complain at all while he was doing it. Hmmm, whenever I wipe her face or hands and try to take her out of that chair she cries like crazy. What's he got that I don't?

Then, when it was time to put her to bed, and I put her to bed every night because she's still nursing and Charlie is inadequate in that area, I told her to say good night to Charlie. As we got closer to him she started to push me away, she was in my arms but pushing on my chest, and leaning in towards him. Okay, she wants to say good night. But when I asked her to come back to me she just pretended like I wasn't there, or at least that I hadn't requested her presence.

Most mommies would be saddened by this and I may be just a teensy, tiny bit, but not really that much. Because the words that come to my mind are relief and freedom. Not that I'm going to start making Charlie do everything for and with her, but now I know that he can and she'll be okay. Now I know that if I leave at night or if he has to get up with her that she'll be fine because she finds the same amount, or more, of comfort in him than in me. Now I can get a part of me back that has been wrapped up in this baby for the last 19 months (yes, even before she was born) and relieve a little of the pressure that goes along with being mommy to an infant. Plus, Charlie gets to spend a little more time realizing how wonderful our little baby number three is, and how having her was the best decision for our family after all.

Kid Quote of the Day

"Sarah, if you were a demi god, who would you want your immortal parent to be?"

-Andy, wrapped up in the world of Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Menace

Amanda has reached a whole new level of trouble. She has figured out how to stand up. I'm telling you, I've tried to prevent all this from happened, but unfortunately she keep developing exactly how she's supposed to. Boy was I spoiled with Sarah's inability to go anywhere. Awww, I'm just kidding. I love that she's moving all about, but things have gotten a little more challenging.

When she was just crawling, and she's still doing that too, all we had to do was make sure nothing was on the floor. You know, like the carpet strings, ha ha. But basically, we just had to make sure the kids picked up their little toys and we swept under the table after meals. Well, we're still working on that last one. Now that she can pull up, there's all these other things she can reach. Like the magazines on the coffee table, oh how she loves to pull those down and rip them to pieces, and the DVR and the CD player. I'm pretty sure she's recorded a few shows of her own pushing all the buttons on the front of the DVR.

The worst part of all, and really not for me but more for the kids, is that she has more access to their stuff. By stuff I really mean their computer games. The other day Andy was playing something on the computer. Amanda crawled up, stood up next to him and started banging on the keyboard. Unfortunately for him he was playing a game that used the keyboard instead of the mouse. The next thing I heard was "Mom, Amanda made me lose my game."

I knew that as she got older she would start doing things to bug them and they wouldn't be as excited about her, I just didn't think it would happen quite so soon. They love to play with her, but they like it to be on their terms. Now they know how I feel most of the time.

Kid Quote of the Day

"My bra hurts."

-Sarah, pointing at her jaw while eating something extra chewy.

Sometimes It Pays To Be Crazy

I know I've brought it up before, but I don't know how much I've really talked about it. For some unknown reason, even to myself, I decided to do things a little differently this time around. Making my own baby food, cloth diapering. That's right, cloth diapers. If anybody had told me five years ago that I'd be using cloth diapers I would have told them they were crazy. Cloth diapers are for crazy people. Why would you want to put yourself through that? No way.

Yeah, so. I'm not really sure why I decided to cloth diaper Amanda. Charlie thought I was crazy, and so did several of my friends. They probably still do. I have two friends who did it quite successfully and it intrigued me. Actually, it wasn't the cloth diapering that interested me as much as the Elimination Communication (EC). EC is also known to the novice as infant potty training, but the hard core EC people get pretty cranky when you call it that. Because, truly, you can't potty train an infant. In a nutshell, babies give signs or signals when they have to go the the bathroom, so you learn to read those signs and take them to the bathroom so they don't have to go in their diaper. So really, it's training the parents, not the babies. Eastern civilization does this all the time. Do you think those ladies out in the fields just let their babies pee and poop on them? I don't think so. They figure out what their babies do right before they go to the bathroom and when they start to do it they take them out of their carrier and let them go. Simple as that.

Well, it's not that simple, but it can be. As I was saying, I have a couple of friends who have done it with a lot of success and for some reason was moved to try it myself. Maybe because it was super cool, but more likely because I was having major issues getting Sarah potty trained and both of their children, a boy for one and a girl for the other so really it works regardless of gender, were pretty much potty trained by age two. I would do anything to not have to repeat what I was going through with Sarah and make it more relaxed and stress free. If EC would get baby number three potty trained earlier than my other two than I was all for it.

I won't go into the whole drawn out story, but basically I slowly got into cloth diapers and EC. At this point I cloth diaper about 99% of the time. The only time I don't is if I'm in a pinch and I don't have any clean cloth diapers, which doesn't happen very often, or we're traveling. It's way too hard to use cloth when you are going on a trip for several reasons. I'm not as consistent with the EC. I probably do it about 10% of the time. Maybe. I should do it every time I change her diaper, but I don't. It's not that I can't, I'm just lazy. It's much easier to just take off the current diaper and put on a new one, as opposed to making a pit stop in the bathroom to see if she will pee. I did it more consistently when she was younger, however, so she still knows how to do it when I ask. That doesn't mean she always does, because she may not need to go, but if she does need to go and I ask she will. It's pretty cool if you think about it.

So, on with my story. Today I took Amanda to the doctor for what I thought was a urinary tract infection (UTI). The last couple of days she has been getting up in the morning and her diaper has had the most pungent, overpowering ammonia smell that you could ever smell. It is like nothing I have ever smelled before. Of course I got on the internet to see what it could be, and it said when baby pee smells like ammonia that it could be a UTI or a kidney infection. I called the nurse just to make sure I should bring her in and of course she recommended we come in today.

Now, we have been to the doctor so much lately that the nurse who takes you back to the exam rooms knows all my kids by name. Do you know how many kids she sees each day? Tons. She knows their names, knows where we go on vacation, knows way too much information about them because WE ARE ALWAYS THERE. Plus, since I have no one else to leave them with, whenever we go to the doctor I usually have all three kids with me, regardless of how many of them are actually sick.

It's not just that nurse, it's several people in that office. So at this point I really don't like to bring them in unless I am positive there is something wrong with them. I would hate for them to think I'm a hypochondriac. Anyway, when we saw the nurse practitioner she said it very well could be a UTI, but the only way to know for sure was to hook Amanda up to a catheter to get a urine sample. What a sad, sad thought.

At that point I asked her if she had ever heard of EC. She hadn't, which kind of surprised me, but no worries. I told her we sort of did it and I would try to get her to pee but had no idea if I could actually do it. I didn't think she would, but thought it would be worth a try because we really needed the urine sample and if I couldn't get her to do it there I was going to have to take the cup home. So, into the bathroom we went. Sarah was really trying to understand why Amanda had to pee in a cup and I tried my best to explain it to her. I asked Amanda to pee and nothing. We weren't in our bathroom, Sarah was jumping all over the place and I thought there is no way and then all of a sudden she did it. It wasn't a ton, but more than enough for the sample.

The nurse practitioner was so impressed. More like blown away. She couldn't believe I had just gotten a 10-month-old to pee in a cup. I was pretty impressed too. I didn't really think she'd do it, but was so glad that she did. Turns out she did not have anything wrong other than she was a tiny bit dehydrated. It's hotter than hot here and since she's been eating more table food she's not nursing or drinking as much. All I need to do is nurse a few extra times a day and give her more water.

Even though I'm far from mastering EC and I still change a lot of wet and dirty diapers, I am so glad that I was willing to try and by doing something different I was able to save my daughter a lot of discomfort for something so small. Also, we may be better off on the potty training track than I thought.

Kid Quote of the Day

Andy: Mommy, if the world was food and food preparation tools what would Costa Rica be?

Me: I don't know Andy, what would it be?

Andy: Toaster Rica.

Now I Remember

There are days when I question why I do what I do. I don't mean what I have for breakfast or the lovely color combinations I chose to wear that day, I'm talking about my chosen profession, that of the stay at home mom. Some people scoff at the role, thinking that it must be so easy, but those people have obviously never tried it. When I first quit working I told myself I was leaving the work force to be the Executive Manager of the Sultan Household. It made me feel a little better to have a title, but that's exactly what you do when you stay at home, manage. I manage the house, I manage the bills, I manage the transportation from one activity and/or sporting event to the next, and I try to manage not going crazy while holding it all together. Charlie has told me time and again that he would not want my job. Some day it will be easier, well, it will still be hard because kids never make it easy, but I won't have to deal with all the frustrations that come with little kids, and I will long for these days again. At least that's what people with older kids tell me.

As I said, there are days when I wonder why I do this and if it's all worth it. Days when there's lots of crying and whining and crying and fighting and crying and name calling and crying and yelling and hey, did I mention crying? There is a lot of crying that goes on in my house. I think it's part of the drama that goes along with all the estrogen milling about. Some days I wonder if I would be happier going to work and trying to communicate with people that actually go to the bathroom when they have to, don't ask the same inane question over and over and over, speak clearly and respectfully and don't roll their eyes whenever you ask them to do something. Other days I try to remember why I wanted three children so desperately (it's still a mystery to Charlie but he goes along with it because he loves me) and is God trying to punish me with this third one? Then other days I'm just trying to keep my head above water and wonder if I am truly a fit mother and if the kids will turn out okay.

Every once in awhile, however, the kids will throw me a bone and I know that I'm okay, that we're okay, and everything I'm doing is not for naught. It's times like this that make me smile, take a deep breath, and gear up for the next day.

Kid Quote of the Day

Sarah: To be in this tent (just a make believe tent on the couch), you have to smell my butt 11 times.

Andy: I'll do it. (Pause in conversation) I did it. Really, I did. I thought about faking it, but I didn't. It didn't smell too bad.

Third Times A Charm

Okay, this is the last time I write about this, because I know you are sick of hearing me whine about it and I am tired of writing about it. However, for the third time in six month someone has asked me if I am pregnant.

I took the kids to get their pictures taken for Father's Day yesterday. Yes, Charlie does read this, but he was on to me anyway. The kids always get him pictures for Father's Day, except last year when I was too tired and pregnant to do anything, so it's not that big of a surprise. The big surprise is which pictures I choose. I spoke to him while we were at the Picture People and the conversation went like this:

Charlie: What are you doing?

Me: We're working on your Father's Day present.

Charlie: Oh, are you at the Picture People?

See. He is the hardest person to get gifts for because he always guesses what they are. Either I suck at giving gifts or he's just a really good guesser, and I choose to believe it's the second one.

Anyway, back to my story. As we were getting ready to leave the store one of the photographers said, "boy, girl?". I had no idea what she was talking about. All three kids were standing with me and it was pretty obvious what sex they are. The girls were both wearing ribbons in their hair and dresses, and Andy does not in any way look like a girl. I guess I looked confused, because she said something like, "are you expecting?" or "don't you have one on the way?". I just looked at her and said "no". She preceded to tell me that yeah, she's not either yet people ask her all the time if she is pregnant as well. So much so that she was thinking of buying one of those things they sell on tv. You know, that you wear and it takes you down two sizes. They're only $39.95. Yes, lady, it's called Spanx. I have not seen them on tv, but I do know about them, and if you think I'm going to wear Spanx all day when it's 100 degrees outside just so stupid people who don't know how to keep their mouths shut won't ask me if I'm pregnant, than you are nuttier than you look. Wow, I didn't know I had that in me. I thought I had calmed down since yesterday but I guess I'm still a little fired up.

Now, I don't know how to say this nicely, and I don't really feel like being nice anyway, but this lady did not look pregnant, she looked fat. I'd like to think that I don't look fat, but I think the writing is on the wall. I'm fat. I really need to reconsider doing those sit ups. The funny thing is, when I was pregnant and my belly was this size, nobody ever asked if I was pregnant. I'd walk around thinking it was so obvious, but people couldn't tell. So why can everybody tell now?

As I see it, I have two options. One, I can just get pregnant again. That way when people ask I don't have to look dejected I can just say why yes, I am. The only problem with that is that I have no desire to be pregnant or have anymore children. Three mini-monsters are more than enough. Plus, I would have the bonus of being a single mother because my husband would probably leave me. Second, I can just start eating like crazy and actually get fat. Then people won't be confused, they'll just know that I am one fat person. Of course, that's not healthy and it may cut my life expectancy, but it might just be a little bit fun. I guess there are two other options. I could starting exercising, but what fun is that, or I could drink myself into oblivion, but that's pretty painful when you have to get up and nurse a baby at 4 a.m. (yes, that's what time I was up doing just that this morning), not to mention what effects it might have on the baby.

So, I promise, I will stop whining about this and actually do something or maybe even a combination of a few things. First of which is to come up with a better comeback.

Kid Quote of the Day

Me: Andy, what Wii games would you like?

Andy: Genius Book of World Records.

Me: You mean the Guinness Book of World Records.

Andy: The Genius Book of World Records.

Me: The Genius Book of World Records. You mean the Guinness Book of World Records?

Andy: Genius.

Finally Charlie had to stop us and explain to Andy that he had the name wrong. I think we were driving him crazy. Ironic how the 'genius' can't get the name of the Guinness Book of Worlds Records correct.

I'll Have What They're Having

As you may have heard, the more children you have the sooner they get to do things. It's not necessarily designed that way, it's just that you become a little more relaxed or less diligent, and the subsequent kids pay attention. They know what they are missing out on. That's really the key, the first kid doesn't know what they are missing. This is especially true with food.

For example, Andy didn't try french fries until he was almost three. In fact, every time I saw my friend Lisa she would ask me if he had had french fries yet. She couldn't believe he had never had them. That was because a) her son, who is Andy's age, had already had them because he had seen his sister eat them, and b) her kids were super picky eaters and that was about all she could get them to eat. Sarah, of course, had french fries at a much earlier age, and to this day Andy will always pick fruit over fries and Sarah will always pick the fries. Maybe it's the kid, but maybe it's the good eating habits he learned and she didn't get enforced enough.

Which leads me to the third kid. No, I have not given her french fries yet, but she is a fan of Chick-fil-A breaded chicken. Who isn't, that stuff rocks! Although I'm trying to feed her healthy food and keep as much junk food away from her, she's on to me and she is one smart cookie. If the kids and I are out somewhere and we purchase something to eat, she's all over it. She wants it. I bought an Icee at Target the other day and she was yelling at me to give her some. Now, when Andy was that age, he wouldn't care that I had a drink or expect some of it, because he didn't know what it was and knew that mom and dad ate different food from him. End of story. Not Amanda. Man, if somebody is eating something, she thinks she should get some of it.

The problem is, usually she does. Of course we don't give her any of the foods she's not supposed to have, like peanut butter or strawberries, we're not crazy. But when the doctor said she could have ice cream, only because we asked - he wasn't really giving that as a meal choice, we started giving her ice cream. Her latest love is ice pops. She loves them and if she sees us with one she will make a huge stink until she gets one. The crazy part is that she can hold them and eat them better than Sarah. Sarah will spill all over and Amanda will eat the entire thing without spilling a drop.

So maybe we're more relaxed or more experience or we just don't care that much about tooth decay, but there has to be at least one benefit of being the youngest. It's the reward she gets for being tackled, picked up, pushed down and rolled on when she's just trying to get around. It's the benefit of getting to do a few things earlier than the older kids. Coming from the youngest of four, it's the small victories that keep you going.

Kid Quote of the Day

Andy: Sarah, get away or I'm going to smack you into next week.

Sarah: No, no, no, no. I do not want to be in next week!

One Man's Trash Is Another One's Treasure

As I've said before, I'm not that excited about Amanda being mobile. It's not that I don't like her to explore, it's just that she puts EVERYTHING into her mouth. Anything she can find. The weird part is the things she chooses to put in her mouth. Like most young children, she's not interested in the toys, that would be too easy. She looks for the tiniest scrap of anything she can find on the floor, and that's what she wants to taste. Let me just tell you, her fine motor skills are amazing.

For awhile her favorite thing to eat was the carpet. Sounds strange, but she would go to the point where the carpet meets the tile and she would pull up the strings from the carpet. These weren't loose strings, she would pull hard until they would come out and then stick them in her mouth. I was always fishing carpet out of her mouth. Now that she has a broader range and can move more, and faster - she's much quicker now than she was in that video I posted just last week, everything the kids drop or leave behind is available to be shoved into her mouth.

Last week I found some sticky mosaic in her poop. If you don't know what that is, it's little, tiny, square-shaped puffy stickers that when all put together on a stick-by-number sheet makes a picture. Sarah loves them, but she is horrible about picking them up and spilling them on the floor. Plus, they are so small it's easy to miss them. I'm not worried that Amanda is going to choke on them, it's just kind of gross.

Lately I have noticed that she doesn't swallow most of the stuff she sticks in her mouth. She sucks on it for a bit and then spits it out. Thankfully. Since we obviously aren't watching her as closely as we should, at least she is smart enough to spit most of the stuff out. Today was the kicker, at one point I asked Andy where she was and he said she was by the fireplace. When I looked at her I could tell something was in her mouth. When I went to check I found a rock from the fireplace in her mouth. They are tiny rocks, nothing that she could choke on, but still disgusting. I thought there was just the one but maybe 15 minutes later she spit out another one. Yuck. Again, lucky she would rather just suck on things than swallow them.

Andy never put that much in his mouth, and I don't remember it being a big issues with Sarah either, so this is kind of new to me. I know she'll get past it eventually, but right now it's a huge pain. You have to watch her so carefully. I spend most of my day sitting close to her to make sure she doesn't get into too much trouble. That leaves me verging on useless and makes the other two slightly annoyed. It's just one more thing we need to let her work out so we can once again lead normal, productive lives.

Kid Quote of the Day

"I think these shorts were made by the people who use their left hand as their wiping hand. The only pocket is in the back on the right."

-Andy, complaining that his shorts did not have any side pockets. Where he got this thought is completely beyond me!

Really, This Again?

I'm sorry if my posts have been lacking lately, or don't make a lot of sense, but I haven't been getting a lot of sleep. It's sort of my fault, because I don't go to sleep on time, but it's more Amanda's fault. She's been waking up early. Too early. 5 a.m. early. This morning I looked at the clock when I first hear her crying and it was 4:52. I wish I could just roll over and go back to sleep and she would sense that I'm just not coming and stop crying, but it doesn't really work that way. Fortunately she doesn't cry really hard, she just cries out every few minutes in a way that says come get me soon before I get really angry.

When I do finally pull myself out of bed because I can't stand it anymore and walk into her room, she's usually sitting behind the bars of her crib like a little jail bird waiting to be sprung. Thank goodness Charlie finally lowered the mattress or she'd probably be on the floor. I think she's getting up for a couple of reasons. A) She's hungry. I'm hoping this is just a growth spurt but it's been going on for over a week so it's not looking so good. B) Her Benadryl and Ibuprofen have worn off. She hasn't cut a new tooth since the first week of April. She's working on the top four right now. You can see them through the gums but they still haven't broken through. Also, after that trip to the zoo on Sunday, where there was was too much cotton in the air and on the leaves of the cottonwood trees, her nose has been running like crazy, her eyes are glazed and she's been very clingy. All of this makes for a very cranky baby very early in the morning.

Yesterday I told the kids that when Amanda gets up that early I should take advantage of it and go for a walk and start to get some exercise. The only problem with that is at 5:30 a.m., after I've nursed her, it's still dark, and I don't like to walk in the dark, and I'm too stinking tired to go walking. This morning when he got up Andy asked Charlie if I was on a walk. Charlie just laughed and said that I was still in bed. That is, of course, after being up with Amanda from 5:00-6:00 and finally getting back to sleep while Charlie took a shower and let Amanda play in the bathroom.

So, I don't know how to fix my problem, or if it is even fixable. I know I could go to sleep earlier, but then I wouldn't have time to write all this wonderful stuff for you. Because I can't do it during the day, the kids would never let me finish. I know I'm supposed to let her scream, but I still don't sleep if I do that, and it just puts my stomach in knots. I guess I can just hope that she gets past it, the teeth come in, the trees stop being trees and very soon she learns to appreciate her precious time in bed.

Kid Quote of the Day

Me: We're going to Dylan's house on Tuesday. Mark is coming too.

Andy: Yay!

Me: Are you happy about that? Do you think all three of you can get along?

Andy: Yeah. When the three of us are together we like to use forbidden words.

Me: Forbidden words?

Andy: Like the s-word, i-word and u-word.

Me: What words are those?

Andy: Stupid, idiot and ugly.

If Only I Had Remembered

Yesterday on the way to the zoo we passed a title and registration place and it dawned on me that I had forgotten to do something very important. You see, some time in April I had gotten a letter from the state of Texas, some transportation blah, blah, blah, telling me it was time to renew my driver's license. At first, before I opened the letter, I thought I had gotten another ticket for running a red light. Those damn cameras are everywhere here. I used to run red lights light crazy because I'm always late and my car is super heavy so once it's going you don't want to slam on the brakes. After one $75 ticket now I'm constantly testing my seat belts and grabbing for things as they fly from the passenger seat to the floor because I refuse to get another stupid ticket for running a red light. There are so many better things I could do with that money.

Anywho, the letter informing me I had to go to the DMV to renew my license came so early, so long before I actually had to go there, that I put it aside, never to be found again, and forgot I needed to renew my license. So yesterday, as we were driving and I remembered that I still needed to do that I was in a little bit of a panic knowing that I was driving with an invalid license. Sorry, it's the type-A in me.

I was kind of hoping to take care of that before school got out, so I only had to take one kid to the DMV with me, but that was not meant to be so the whole Sultan family, minus the lucky one who gets to to go to camp (a.k.a. work) everyday, hopped into the car and went to the Department of Public Safety today. If they weren't safe before we got there they certainly weren't after we arrived.

Our arrival was a little shaky. First of all, every parking space was taken. You know that's never a good sign. We had to drive around and stalk people to get a parking spot. Second, Amanda was asleep so I was going to take her inside in her car seat. Within minutes, while I was still trying to get proof of insurance and registration information out of the glove compartment, Andy did something that made Sarah scream, this absolutely horrible noise she has been making for the last two days that needs to stop very soon or something bad will happen, and of course woke up Amanda. After letting both kids know they would go to their rooms when we got home, I stupidly left Amanda in the car seat and we all went inside. Then she cried until I took her out of the car seat, duh, so I had to carry her the rest of the time while keeping track of my diaper bag, the car seat, and the two older kids.

Luckily for me Andy and Sarah had their Didj and Leapster, because there were about 100 people inside the DMV. No joke. It was packed, which makes sense after how long it took to find a parking spot. It was only 9:30 a.m. Luckily, a lot of them were there for something else, and the line for renewing a license was only about 20 people. That doesn't sound so bad, but do you know how long it takes 20 people to go through that line? It seems like forever, but it was only about an hour. An hour with a baby on your hip and two on the floor seems like an eternity. Amanda was about to lose it by the time we got to the front because she was hungry and tired and we had been up since 5 a.m. (yeah, I don't know what's up with that but it's been going on for over a week now). I remember before kids how I would have been so annoyed to stand in line somewhere for an hour because I had so many better things to do. Now I would love to stand in line by myself without anybody drooling on me or asking me to referee or yelling at me for something like not knowing they were going to be thirsty and bringing them a sippy cup. Oh, if only I knew then what was to come.

Finally we got up to the counter and it was pretty painless. I thought for sure since my license was expired they were going to make me take the written test and the driving test and whatever else they could make me take to teach me a lesson, but they really just took my finger prints, made me take the shortest eye test in history and took my pictures. $25 later I was out of there.

In the end, what could have been a horrible experience wasn't too bad. The kids were occupied enough that they didn't fight and were quiet. We got out of there just in time before Amanda lost it. Nobody got hurt and I didn't lose my cool. What a great way to spend our first day of summer vacation. Can't wait to see what we can come up with next!

Kid Quote of the Day

"Birds of a feather flock together unless one gets left behind because someone didn't get their way."

-Andy, trying to make up a saying to get Sarah to give in and do what he wanted. I couldn't say anything because I was laughing too hard.

This Is Why We Have Rules

We had a family day today. You know, where you pack up the family with your water bottles and snacks and go somewhere for several hours at a time? I'm sure you've heard of them, or actually done them yourselves. We don't do family days very often. I mean, we sit around the house as a family doing nothing all the time, but packing up all of us and going somewhere doesn't happen that much lately. Believe it or not, it went pretty well.

We had a good time, but we didn't make the best choices. Actually, Charlie and I didn't make the best choices, we didn't let the kids make any of the decisions today. I like it that way. We decided to go to the zoo. We have two main rules about the zoo. One, don't go in the summer because it's way too hot. Two, don't go on the weekend because there are too many people there. As you can see, we broke both of those rules.

We though maybe if we got there early we could beat the heat. Not so much. We arrived at 10:30 a.m. at the thermometer on the car already said 91 degrees. That's right people who don't live in Texas, it's June 6 and it's already in the 90s by 10 a.m. One very good reason why it is no fun to live in Texas. Of course if you can survive the summers your memory kicks in during the winters and once again you remember why you live here. So, all the animals were hiding in the shade and lying down. None of them were romping and scampering about, just lots of hot, lazy animals.

We don't usually like to go to the zoo on the weekends, because that's when everybody goes, but our pool is a green lagoon filled with algae right now and until the pool guys are done fixing it our first choice for weekend entertainment is out of order. When we arrived there were tons of cars in the parking lot, but it turned out okay. It never felt cramped or crowded and we were able to see everything we wanted.

I wasn't sure what Amanda would get out of it, because I've tried taking little kids to the zoo before and it's kind of a waste. You point directly at the animal and they look somewhere off in space at something totally different. However, when I pulled Amanda, hot sweaty Amanda, out of the stroller and showed her the elephants, she got a huge grin on her face and let out a little laugh. So, at least she saw what I was showing her that time. She also liked looking at the scary, over sized carp in the little river and the parakeets in the bird sanctuary, but that may be all she saw the entire day.

Andy and Sarah seemed to have a good time. Sarah is finally at an age where you can point things out and she can see them or she'll ask good questions about the animals and listen while you read the signs about them. Of course Andy's reading all the signs himself which is also nice. So, even though it was crazy hot we had a pretty good visit.

After the zoo we went to a nearby pancake house. Open 24 hours. All of us love breakfast food, if you've ever been to our house on the weekend you know how much we love to do big breakfasts, so the kids were ecstatic to have breakfast for the second time in one day. Even better, we ended up having cereal for dinner so we actually had breakfast for every meal today. Overall, a great end to a great day, even with all the rule breaking involved.

Kid Quote of the Day

"If I were a bird I'd want to live in here. No hunters, no danger and I could probably date all the girls I wanted."

-Andy, at the parakeet sanctuary at the zoo, where we got to feed seed sticks to the birds.

They Didn't Make Them Like That When I Was A Kid

Today we went to the open house for Camp Thurman. Camp Thurman is a day camp that Andy is going to this summer about 30 minutes from our house. It's been there for years, but I had never heard about it until this year when a friend asked if Andy wanted to go with her son. There is just one word to describe this camp. Awesome.

It's an amazing adventure camp. It would be right out of the movies if it only had a lake with canoeing and horseback riding. But lets not focus on what it doesn't have. What it does have is three swimming pools, two rock climbing walls, several zip lines, archery, bb gun shooting area, and tons of other climbing and obstacle activities. On top of that they do skits and lots of trust/team building activities. Most of the counselors are previous campers who loved it so much they didn't want to leave.

Best of all, the camp is from 9:00-4:00. All day. Not only is Andy going to be having a great time away from us, wearing himself out, but I will get to spend some quality time with the girls without lots of fighting and yelling. Truthfully, a win win for all. Now if only there was some way that Charlie and I could go to Camp Thurman and leave the kids at home.

Last Day

Today is the last day of school. I'm not really looking forward to summer, because I have to spend WAY too much time with my kids, but there are a few good things about not having to go to school. First, I don't have to drop Sarah off, kick and screaming and crying for me, and feel like a total loser as I walk out the door. Even though it only lasts five minutes and everyday she says she had a great day at school, it still makes me feel crappy. Also, it doesn't make me sad or sympathetic, it just pisses me off. It does not endear her to me in any way. Second, we're always late everywhere we go, and this is one less thing we have to be worried about being late for. Of course there will be camps this summer, but most of them start a tiny bit later and the kids will be more excited to go to those. So, I'll try to muster a "Yay, it's summer!".


If I had to grade myself, and of course I do, I'd give myself a C+ this year. Just above average, which for a stay at home mom isn't that good. I wish I could blame all of it on Amanda, which I can't because I have other friends in practically the same situation I'm in who did way better than I did, but I can use her as an excuse. At Andy's school I didn't do much. I preferred to volunteer with my wallet this year instead of my time. Any time they asked for parents to donate anything or bring something in, I was your woman. Any time they asked for parents to come to the school and do something, I ignored the request like it never came.


Part of the reason I didn't do stuff at the elementary school was because people told me that the school really didn't want siblings around. Nobody ever told me that directly, that I couldn't bring the girls with me, but a lot of things that came home from school were just for a student and parent. I had heard from other parents who were there for Kindergarten last year that siblings weren't that welcome, so I stuck to it. If siblings weren't welcome neither was I. It wasn't until last weekend, you know, four days before school ended, that one of the moms who is pretty active on the PTA told me that our elementary school isn't like that, maybe others in the district are, and she brought her youngest up to the school all the time when she was little. I'm sure she did, but I'm still not convinced that the teachers weren't snickering behind her back about the fact that she always had that kid with her.


So, I didn't do that well with attendance of events at Andy's school. Whenever he needed something, I made sure he had it. He was always prepared for anything that was happening at school. I didn't forget things. I just wasn't there went they had their parties or did anything where they invited the parents. I finally figured out this week that most of the things where they invite parents are right after drop-off, usually over by 8:30 or 9:00, so if I had just gotten up earlier I could have made some of those things. Note for next year, I'll try a little harder.


I did a little better at Sarah's school because I was the volunteer coordinator. So you can't really slack off in that job. I was totally on top of all the volunteer needs for the school, just missed a few things for her personally. I forgot to mark down when she was student of the week and didn't bring in her poster until the last day. Oops. The communication from the school changed significantly from last year, and that threw me off. Last year they sent home papers in abundance about everything going on at school. Too much. This year they barely sent anything home and sent all communication by email. That was good, but too easy to ignore. So, I forgot a couple of days that they didn't have to wear uniforms, and missed the first day of crazy week completely. Oh well, luckily she's little and probably won't remember.


So, I have some improving to do, but it shouldn't be too hard. I'm smart, and my pregnancy and just-had-a-baby brain is starting to coming back to me, so I should be much better by this August. That is, if I survive the summer. I have the kids signed up for lots of activities, not all of them at the same time so that they don't spend too much time together, and we'll be traveling a lot. Just the kids and me though, internet robbers, Charlie is staying home to work while I go on crazy adventures with the kids. Two weeks in Michigan with my parents and then a family reunion on my Mom's side in Colorado.

By the time August rolls around I will be ready for school to start. Hopefully the kids will too. Then we can happily get back into our school routine. For now, we'll just try to enjoy some time off and not kill each other.

Kid Quote of the Day

Andy: Strawberries are my favorite fruit.

Me: Really? I thought apples were.

Andy: No, I only like apples when they're moldy, when they've been sitting out for about three hours.

Andy explaining that he doesn't like his apples cold, right from the fridge. Moldy wasn't exactly what he meant.

If You Want It To Work You Need To Close The Door

Last night I got to go to Mom's Night Out, yay! Unfortunately, it was only me and one other person. Fortunately, that person was Ellie who I love and haven't gotten to see much lately so we had a great time catching up. I love Mom's Night Out. Too bad it's only once a month. Of course, once a month is better than not at all.

Anyway, this really isn't the point of my post. This morning, as I was getting Andy's lunch ready, he told me how they had popsicles after dinner last night. Or maybe Sarah told me. Someone told me. It was a big deal, not to me, to them. It became a big deal to me a few hours later when I realized that someone had left the freezer door open. The freezer to the fridge in the garage. Where it is at least 90 degrees. All night long. Ugh! Needless to say, everything melted.

Yesterday I was complaining that the freezer was too full and I didn't have anywhere to put anything. Today I have a completely empty freezer. Yay me. I say this with no enthusiasm in my voice at all. I'm sorry to say, I thought Charlie was the culprit. Luckily I asked him about it before yelling at him about it, and he told me Andy was the one who went to get the popsicles out of the freezer. When I asked Andy about it, his first response was, "Well, hey", which is what he usually says when he gets into his defense mode. Then he finished with "the freezer was really full and I couldn't get the box to stay in and I didn't want to spend the time to make sure the door shut". Okay, but you couldn't ask Daddy to fix it so the door would stay shut, you just decided to leave it open? Some times that kid can be so amazingly smart and other times he is just a huge dumb ass. This would be one of those times.

So, I explained to him that everything in the freezer melted, and I had to throw it away. Including his popsicles. Sarah wanted to go to the store that minute to buy more, but I don't think they'll be getting any popsicles for awhile. I also explained to him that at least $100 worth of food had to be thrown out and replaced, and instead of replacing food we already had we could have used the money to buy more popsicles or even a Wii game. I think it was then that it really sunk in what he had done and he sadly apologized.

I have no idea if the kids learned anything from this. I learned that Andy isn't quite old enough to do everything you think he can do and you have to check to make sure he does it right. I also learned the quickest way to clean out a full fridge is to leave the door open. On a positive note now there's lots of room in the freezer.

Kid Quote of the Day

Andy: Mommy, if you could be any character from (insert favorite movie, book, or tv show here), which would it be?

Me: Andy, if you could ask me any question over and over, nonstop, everyday for the rest of your life, what would it be?

For Your Dining Entertainment

Unfortunately for Amanda, she spends a lot of time in her high chair. I never just stick her there because I don't have anywhere else to put her, I don't use it like a playpen or anything, I guess she just gets left there after she's done eating. I'll start to do the dishes, or I'll start to make dinner for the rest of the family. She's finishing up a rice cake or something else I've left on her tray and I just won't go back for awhile.

Yes, it's not very nice to leave her there, but at least I can watch her and I know she's eating something that's good for her instead of the kids' dried leftovers off the floor. In general I would think it gets pretty boring for a baby to just sit there, but not so much for the third child. Even when the older two aren't interacting with her, it's pretty funny to watch them just being themselves. Most of the time, however, they can't just let her sit they, they come over to play with her. So, she doesn't even have to find her own entertainment, it comes to her. Whether they admit it or not, and they usually do, my kids love their baby sister, no matter how much she cramps their lifestyle.

Kid Quote of the Day

Sarah and I have been fighting a lot about going to school. Thank God this is the last week. Here is just one of our conversations:

Sarah: I don't want to go to school.

Me: If you don't go to school you won't learn how to tell time or read or count past 20.

Sarah: 20, 30, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 1.

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Sarah just smiled and laughed a little too, maybe because I was laughing, maybe because she knew I was right.