The one parenting rule that Charlie and I have agreed upon and stuck firmly to ever since our first child was born was no kids in our bed. Occasionally, when Andy was little and sick we would let him sleep with us, or if we were on a family vacation, but we would nip that in the bud pretty quickly. We knew way too many people who had let their kids in and they never left. We did not want to be those people. Don't worry, there are plenty of other parenting rules we have blown completely out of the water.
Sometimes, when Charlie is out of town I will let one of the kids, usually Andy because he almost always asks, sleep with me if they have a bad dream or aren't feeling well. Most of time time when they ask I say no, but in those special circumstances when I think it will make them feel better and prevent me from having to get up numerous times to check on them in the middle of the night I will make an exception to our rule. Last night was one of those cases.
It started yesterday morning when Sarah decided on her own she was going to take a morning nap. I should have known right then something was wrong. Sarah never naps and hasn't since she was about two and a half. Not only that, she had put a coat on because she was cold and our air conditioner hasn't been working well so she was sleeping in her hot room with a coat and blankets. After she woke up I felt her head and it was warm, very warm. I took her temperature and it was over 100 degrees. Bummer. Amanda had had a temperature over 100 degrees the day before but seemed okay now, so I gave Sarah some Motrin and decided we'd just watch it throughout the day. However, when she told me her ears hurt I knew we needed to go to the doctor. I don't mess with ear infections, because Andy had them monthly when he was little and I still think he has some hearing loss as a result, and if my kids say their ears hurt we go.
I made appointments for both the girls since neither one of them seemed to feel really well. That was the third trip to the doctor we'd taken in less than two weeks. Another $40 down the drain. After the nurse practitioner looked at Sarah's ears, nose and throat she determined it wasn't an ear infection. It was hand, foot and mouth disease. Basically, it's a horrible sore throat that is covered with little sores kind of like cold sores. Based on what several people have told me, it is probably worse than strep throat. Both girls had it. Oh joy! Even better, since it's a virus there is nothing we can give them and we just have to wait it out. She said their throats would be sore for about eight more days. Unbelievable!
The evening started out with Sarah in her bed. However, she woke around 8:30p and wanted me to lie with her. I compromised and told her she could sleep in my bed if she promised not to cry until I got there. Charlie was out of town for the evening so it wasn't a big deal to let her sleep with me and I knew she would sleep much better if I was next to her. She agreed and happily went to sleep in Charlie's spot. My first mistake.
When it was time to put Andy to bed, I knew he wouldn't want to go to sleep in his bed without Sarah in the room (as I've said before, they share a room and don't really like to sleep without each other). So, I offered another compromise and told him he could sleep on the futon in our room. We generally only let them sleep there if we have company that needs to use their room or if they keep waking up at night, but I was trying to prevent a problem so I got him all set up and tucked him in. My second mistake.
My third mistake was that I went to bed way too late. I have a bad habit of doing that when Charlie is out of town. Mostly because I get my second wind after the kids go to sleep and really enjoy the time to myself, but also because when Charlie is home he badgers me to go to bed. Of course he only does this because he loves me so I don't get too upset. I didn't get in bed until after midnight and when I did I sort of woke up Sarah. She would have gone back to bed, but she felt really hot so I took her to the bathroom and gave her some more Motrin before getting into bed for good. Sounds reasonable, but it really just woke her up more. She'd already been sleeping for six hours, so why would she want to go back to sleep? It wasn't too bad until my fourth and final mistake of the evening.
About an hour later, Andy got into bed with us. I was too tired to fight with him and didn't even ask what his problem was, I just rolled over to make room. Sarah was a hot box, her fever hadn't broken yet, and Andy kept rolling over to get close to me. Sarah started whining because she was still sort of awake and couldn't get back to sleep, I had no room, and it was hot. All I could think of was the little amount of sleep I was going to get and how uncomfortable it was to sleep between two little kids, even if we were in a king sized bed.
In the end, I survived. Luckily I have had lots of training in little to no sleep thanks to Amanda and she hasn't been sleeping through the night long enough for me to get out of the habit. I do remember, however, why we are so strict about our no kids in our bed rule, and don't think I will be making anymore exception any time soon.
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