We started doing the Elf on the Shelf when Andy was in Kindergarten. Back then there was no Pinterest for people to post their amazing and annoying elf antics, and parents weren't trying to one-up each other with naughty little elf pictures. No, the elf just came, watched the kids, moved around and then reported back to Santa. Charlie and I can barely remember to move the elf (except this year he finally wised up and put an alarm on his phone that has saved us so many times) so we certainly weren't going to join the ranks of crazy parents who have nothing better to do during the holiday season that let their elf mess up their kitchen or bathroom or whatever else and then actually have to clean it all up again the next day. So, we just tell the kids we don't have a naughty elf and that is the end of that.
Andy has always been skeptical of the elf. It's only in the last year or two that he hasn't announced that the elf freaks him out and hasn't been disconcerted by the elf's presence. I don't know if that's because he's just used to it coming or he's getting older or because Amanda feels the exact opposite. Amanda cannot wait to get up every morning to see if she can find the elf. As soon as her clock says 7:00 she comes into my room and asks me to help her get dressed. It took me a few days to figure it out, but it's because one of the few rules that the kids actually follow on weekdays is that they have to get dressed before they are allowed to go downstairs.
Amanda always wants to be the first person downstairs so she can be the first person to find the elf, so she wants to get dressed as soon as she is possibly allowed. She knows that she is not allowed to get up before 7:00 so I'm pretty sure every morning she just stares at the clock and waits. One morning she called out to me at 6:45 because she just couldn't wait any longer, and I had to take her downstairs in her pajamas and then bring her back up to get dressed. Another morning I couldn't function enough to get out of bed and help her get dressed so I told her she was allowed to go downstairs only to find the Elf and then she had to come back up to get dressed.
So pretty much every year there is something that makes us curse the day we ever started this "fun" tradition. But here's how one person can spoil the whole thing. Last week Andy told me that a girl in his class caught her mom moving their elf. Then he asked me if we move our elf. I should have come up with some great answer or one of those answers that are really a question, but all I could say was "Of course not!". Someday that kid is going to curse me for all the lying we have done to him in the spirit of the season. But I'm not mad at him, I'm mad at his classmates' mom. Doesn't she know the kids talk, and when she messed up in front of her daughter she really messed up in front of her whole class?
That is why you have to watch out what you tell your kids, especially your school-aged kids, because they're always hearing things from their classmates. Kind of makes you think homeschooling isn't so bad, until you remember that it's homeschooling.
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Some Things Never Change
When Andy was little, one of the ways I taught him his colors was to ask him what color his fruit snacks were. We'd be driving in the car and he would hold each one up and tell me what color it was before he shoved it in his mouth. Once he mastered his colors he continued to tell me what color or shape his fruit snacks were every time he ate a bag.
After awhile I didn't care anymore but he continued to tell me. When I say after awhile, I'm talking one to two years later. He would not stop. I even got to the point where I told him I didn't care and I didn't want him to tell me anymore. He ignored me and continued to tell me all about his fruit snacks every single time. I should have learned at that point just not to buy them and put myself out of my misery, but I'm not that smart. Eventually, as he got older and was in elementary school, he stopped.
Well, maybe it just went dormant. Fast forward to today's dinner. We're sitting at the table and I'm handing out gummy vitamins to the kids. Andy looks at his and says, "Daddy, guess what shape I got?"
Some things will never end.
After awhile I didn't care anymore but he continued to tell me. When I say after awhile, I'm talking one to two years later. He would not stop. I even got to the point where I told him I didn't care and I didn't want him to tell me anymore. He ignored me and continued to tell me all about his fruit snacks every single time. I should have learned at that point just not to buy them and put myself out of my misery, but I'm not that smart. Eventually, as he got older and was in elementary school, he stopped.
Well, maybe it just went dormant. Fast forward to today's dinner. We're sitting at the table and I'm handing out gummy vitamins to the kids. Andy looks at his and says, "Daddy, guess what shape I got?"
Some things will never end.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Craptastic Day
Today didn't start out too bad. I got way less sleep than I should have. It could be that my head is swirling with all the things that still need to be done before the 25th, it could have just been an off day. Honestly, I don't feel stressed out, but sometimes it's still there. I was sort of awake when Amanda called out to me at 6:45 because she wanted to be the first one downstairs to find the elf. You know, the Elf On The Shelf. Yes, we still do that, I have a different post for that though so I won't go into it now.
After Amanda found the elf I sent her up to Charlie and finished cleaning up all the cookies and chocolate dipped items I made last night (again, another post that I may or may not get to) and then got dressed, made lunches and did everything else we do in the mornings. So far everything okay. I dropped Amanda off at school, hit the gym, picked her back up and then headed north to visit a college roommate and do a meal class at her house.
I used to do meal class in Texas all the time. I loved it because at any point I would have at least five frozen meals in my fridge and if I had no idea what we were going to have for dinner I would pull one out. So when I got this invitation I jumped at the chance of having ready made meals in my freezer again. All went well on the drive up until about four miles from her house I got a nice indicator light that the tire pressure in my back right tire was low. It kept flashing and the tire pressure kept dropping. Not good. I was pretty sure it was a flat tire which was confirmed when I pulled up outside her house. No problem, I called our insurance company and they sent somebody to fix it while I was doing the meal class and my car was ready to go by the time I was done. I thought my troubles would end there.
I got home just in time to pick up the big kids from school and then took the girls with me to get the tire repaired. You are only supposed to drive on the spare for 40 miles and my friends lives just over 30 miles away so I didn't very many miles to play with. Except the piece of metal in my tire was so large that they couldn't repair it and I had to buy a new tire, ugh. We had to leave straight from there to take Amanda to speech therapy (which I had moved because of the meal class) but due to traffic and and not getting to leave as early as I wanted to because we were stuck at the tire place we were going to be late. So I tried to take some back roads to get us there quicker but they were slow too. I finally found one that was wide open and sped up to get there faster and got pulled over going 12 miles over the speed limit. All that made us even later for speech therapy so we only got to have a 10 minute session.
So to sum it up, so that I could have 10 wonderful meals waiting for me in my freezer at any given time I had to drive 40 minutes each way, buy a new tire, get a speeding ticket and pay full price for a 10 minute therapy session. Expensive, crappy day.
On the bright side, Charlie picked up dinner and I have a new tire and now my daughters know what happens when Mommy says she can't go any faster or she'll get pulled over and I can start over tomorrow. However, if the police call me and ask for a charitable donation, I've already given this year.
After Amanda found the elf I sent her up to Charlie and finished cleaning up all the cookies and chocolate dipped items I made last night (again, another post that I may or may not get to) and then got dressed, made lunches and did everything else we do in the mornings. So far everything okay. I dropped Amanda off at school, hit the gym, picked her back up and then headed north to visit a college roommate and do a meal class at her house.
I used to do meal class in Texas all the time. I loved it because at any point I would have at least five frozen meals in my fridge and if I had no idea what we were going to have for dinner I would pull one out. So when I got this invitation I jumped at the chance of having ready made meals in my freezer again. All went well on the drive up until about four miles from her house I got a nice indicator light that the tire pressure in my back right tire was low. It kept flashing and the tire pressure kept dropping. Not good. I was pretty sure it was a flat tire which was confirmed when I pulled up outside her house. No problem, I called our insurance company and they sent somebody to fix it while I was doing the meal class and my car was ready to go by the time I was done. I thought my troubles would end there.
I got home just in time to pick up the big kids from school and then took the girls with me to get the tire repaired. You are only supposed to drive on the spare for 40 miles and my friends lives just over 30 miles away so I didn't very many miles to play with. Except the piece of metal in my tire was so large that they couldn't repair it and I had to buy a new tire, ugh. We had to leave straight from there to take Amanda to speech therapy (which I had moved because of the meal class) but due to traffic and and not getting to leave as early as I wanted to because we were stuck at the tire place we were going to be late. So I tried to take some back roads to get us there quicker but they were slow too. I finally found one that was wide open and sped up to get there faster and got pulled over going 12 miles over the speed limit. All that made us even later for speech therapy so we only got to have a 10 minute session.
So to sum it up, so that I could have 10 wonderful meals waiting for me in my freezer at any given time I had to drive 40 minutes each way, buy a new tire, get a speeding ticket and pay full price for a 10 minute therapy session. Expensive, crappy day.
On the bright side, Charlie picked up dinner and I have a new tire and now my daughters know what happens when Mommy says she can't go any faster or she'll get pulled over and I can start over tomorrow. However, if the police call me and ask for a charitable donation, I've already given this year.
Friday, December 13, 2013
Kid Quote of the Day
Amanda: It smells in here.
Me: That's because we both pooped.
Amanda: My poop doesn't smell like anything, only yours smells.
And so it begins...
Me: That's because we both pooped.
Amanda: My poop doesn't smell like anything, only yours smells.
And so it begins...
Sunday, December 8, 2013
The Holiday Season, So Far So Good
I'm not sure why, but this crazy, jam-packed, super short holiday time is not stressing me out. I tried really hard not to go crazy buying things for the kids and even though I bought a little more than I planned and maybe they got two items wrapped as one for a couple nights of Hanukkah in general I have done pretty well. We'll see what I find when I actually start wrapping the Christmas presents and pulling them out of all their hiding places and then I'll let you know if I was good or not.
So far we've been spreading out everything pretty well. Last week we came home from Thanksgiving on Saturday instead of Sunday and that really helped because we were able to get the tree up on Sunday. I think we are going to forgo lights this year even though the kids keep asking and Charlie thinks he can get the nets on the bushes, because now there are really only two weekends left and who does something for just two weekends? Today we did Gingerbread houses and next weekend I think I will be in the kitchen most of the weekend making cookies and other chocolate dipped goodies for all the teachers and then most of the stress will be done. Oh yes, I still have to wrap all those gifts and get a few boxes shipped to my parent's house, but let's not think about that.
How about I just show you some lovely pictures of my kids and their Gingerbread houses? I would have to say this was by far the best year in all of our house making years. We decided to invest the extra $9 so each kid could have their own house and nobody would whine or cry that they had to share a house or that "she didn't make the roof the way I wanted to". Yes, they should learn to share, but not when it comes to these houses. We've had way too many bad experiences to mess with it. Everybody was so happy and creative and now they are old enough that all Charlie and I pretty much had to do was help them open the candy and squeeze out the pre-made frosting. Even Andy had a hard time with that. We've gone the super easy route at this point and buy the pre-made houses with the frosting already in a pouch with a nozzle and it even came with snowmen and gingerbread men and trees. Easy peasy lemon squeezy! For this first time it was actually an enjoyable experience.
Here's hoping the next few weeks go just as smoothly!
So far we've been spreading out everything pretty well. Last week we came home from Thanksgiving on Saturday instead of Sunday and that really helped because we were able to get the tree up on Sunday. I think we are going to forgo lights this year even though the kids keep asking and Charlie thinks he can get the nets on the bushes, because now there are really only two weekends left and who does something for just two weekends? Today we did Gingerbread houses and next weekend I think I will be in the kitchen most of the weekend making cookies and other chocolate dipped goodies for all the teachers and then most of the stress will be done. Oh yes, I still have to wrap all those gifts and get a few boxes shipped to my parent's house, but let's not think about that.
How about I just show you some lovely pictures of my kids and their Gingerbread houses? I would have to say this was by far the best year in all of our house making years. We decided to invest the extra $9 so each kid could have their own house and nobody would whine or cry that they had to share a house or that "she didn't make the roof the way I wanted to". Yes, they should learn to share, but not when it comes to these houses. We've had way too many bad experiences to mess with it. Everybody was so happy and creative and now they are old enough that all Charlie and I pretty much had to do was help them open the candy and squeeze out the pre-made frosting. Even Andy had a hard time with that. We've gone the super easy route at this point and buy the pre-made houses with the frosting already in a pouch with a nozzle and it even came with snowmen and gingerbread men and trees. Easy peasy lemon squeezy! For this first time it was actually an enjoyable experience.
Here's hoping the next few weeks go just as smoothly!
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Kid Quote of the Day
"Mommy, I'm not ticklish but when someone tickles me really hard it makes me laugh."
-Amanda
-Amanda
Vacuum Kiss
Yep, it's been over two weeks since I've written. I'd love to tell you it's because we've been doing all these glamorous things and I just haven't found the time, but that's not it. It's actually the opposite. The kids have gotten, how do I put it, boring. They aren't being as difficult as they should be, and therefore there aren't as many good stories to tell. I'm keep them busy after school so they can't interact and when they are home they have homework and practice and very little free time.
We just got back from five days in Miami which was also uneventful. In a very good way. I did a lot of online shopping and we saw friends and family and enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving feast put on by Charlie's mom and just hung out. The weather wasn't really nice enough to swim or go to the beach, but everybody was cool with that. Charlie and I even snuck in a run together which happens never.
This evening as we were finishing up dinner and thinking about getting the kids to bed Amanda crawled into my lap. Despite her sassy attitude she is quite the snuggler and the more tired she gets the more she likes to snuggle. Lately she also likes to kiss me on the nose. Or so she pretends. She acts like she is going to kiss me on the nose and instead sucks on it for just a second, but it's a second too long. I've showed her eskimo kisses and butterfly kisses and she knows how to do a regular kiss, but I can't get her away from this nose sucking kiss. She thinks it's hilarious. So today I told her that it was like she was trying to suck my boogers out, just like a vacuum cleaner and we dubbed it the vacuum kiss. Totally gross, but at least it has a name.
And this, my friends, is why you haven't heard much from me lately. Because really, did you want to know about this?
We just got back from five days in Miami which was also uneventful. In a very good way. I did a lot of online shopping and we saw friends and family and enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving feast put on by Charlie's mom and just hung out. The weather wasn't really nice enough to swim or go to the beach, but everybody was cool with that. Charlie and I even snuck in a run together which happens never.
This evening as we were finishing up dinner and thinking about getting the kids to bed Amanda crawled into my lap. Despite her sassy attitude she is quite the snuggler and the more tired she gets the more she likes to snuggle. Lately she also likes to kiss me on the nose. Or so she pretends. She acts like she is going to kiss me on the nose and instead sucks on it for just a second, but it's a second too long. I've showed her eskimo kisses and butterfly kisses and she knows how to do a regular kiss, but I can't get her away from this nose sucking kiss. She thinks it's hilarious. So today I told her that it was like she was trying to suck my boogers out, just like a vacuum cleaner and we dubbed it the vacuum kiss. Totally gross, but at least it has a name.
And this, my friends, is why you haven't heard much from me lately. Because really, did you want to know about this?
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